I gratefully decline the nomination

Paradigm Shift and I are honored to have received an unwarranted Liebster blog commendation by fellow adoptive parent activist, Terra Trevor. Terra is the author of Pushing up the Sky, the beautiful memoir of her journey as an adoptive parent as it intersected with the lives of her family. She is editor and contributor at River, Blood and Corn, which promotes community and strengthens cultures with storytelling, poetry and prose. In addition, Terra is a supporter of KAAN’s efforts to bring dialog around racism into the adoptive parent community, which she does at the annual conference each year and as co-moderator of the Facebook Group Racism and White Privilege for the Adoptive Parent.

I am also really fortunate to know Terra as a friend. We met at a KAAN Conference many years ago, and our friendship has grown through the years. Terra has taught me more than she can ever know about what it means to really embrace our humanity. To Terra, this does not mean simply acknowledging all sides of ourselves, it means working to change the things we know prevent us from being all that we can be. Terra is a tireless fighter against racism and for the dignity of all people. She works in her community, and with her voice and pen, across the globe.

I cannot accept this nomination, however. There are first the obvious reasons that my recent writing doesn’t deserve it and my activism pales in comparison with that of adoptees, first parents and many other adoptive parents who are on the front lines of this good fight. Additionally, I’m consciously trying not to fall into the trap I fell into with my previous blog, in which the awards, followers and cross-linking translated to popularity, and popularity in turn translated into a sense of importance. I’m not important in this community, I’m just an adoptive mom trying to support adoptees and first parents, and to help other adoptive moms and dads understand that true love of our children demands our activism to make sure adoption serves children who truly need its help.

Terra, I am truly grateful to have been considered. I’m glad that it has given me an opportunity to publicly thank you for your friendship over the years, and for your example and inspiration. You have no idea know how many times I have thought, in a challenging situation, What would Terra do? Although I fail i.n pretty much every case to live up to your example, it still guides me and keeps me from greater failures. Thank you.

And thank you to those of you who are reading here and also doing your best to make adoption ethical.

Comments

Janee said…
Yet another Korean adoptee has been murdered, this time by his adoptive US father, a decorated military veteran and NSA employee:

http://www.nbcwashington.com/news/local/Father-Charged-With-Adopted-Sons-Death--245972321.html
Janee, it is a horrible story. Justice must be done, and it must be prevented from happening again, by ending adoption from Korea if that is the only way to ensure unstable people cannot adopt.

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